Ah-Yul Blogspot; Serial Confessionist

Hah?! LAMPA!

lol! i di nothing, i jus didnt noe of any suitable title. Kirekan headlines ar nie. Niwae, aftr blog hopping, reading blogs. failed relationship, gaduh shits.. insecurities.. and some too lovey dovey, it mkes me think.. and think.. fcuk la. Its soo pointless u noe.. i noe.. yes. Y brood over small matters, why do we need to get ourselves hurt time and time. Ohh im no cookie dough ice cream, i've had multiple failed relationships too. Ohh well.. sometimes i wish they dun fail.. i mean u noe.. its funny hw wen 2 people ferst gt to noe each other, hw funny wen they start dating.. much more funny on hw happy moments go. Trust me, i gt short term memory, i had frgttn abt shitty arguments and stuff but i always remember sweet moments.. yeah!! its all up in here.

Who me? nahx.. serious fcuk, if someone were to say i'm in love.. nah a'ah. Crushes, perhaps.. love no. I'm nt the type who goes arnd saying.. i love you to someone, and next minute.. lets say afigth happen or quarrel 2 weeks later ok maybe less say i love u to another. Love is sucha strong wrd to me. hhahaha!

Maybe, coz i only felt it once..
c'mon babe, we knew its gonna be a nice picture..
but u wldnt wanna roll over..

Nahx not blaming anyone.
NS soon i soo need to gt my priorities right.
N dis darn hair is getting soo hot stuff as each day goes by, call it a nice haircut.
Well its oni nicer if i style it, if not.. im no diff den a tech geek.

and ohk.. i've been havng aches all over.
thanks to my recent wrkout sessions. Ive been lazy to do it since the DX3 period. Nw dat its over, im gtting back into shape n fcuk 200 push ups a nite is a feat nwadays. cibai.. damn those sticks n bottles. niwae did my 100. and now dis arms wun flex. Hahah!! hw am i suppose to dance??

speakin of which, ive strapped on my shoes to help out my lovely crew fr the YP show.
hehehe!!
ok soo prac later at 3. im soo screwed.
1 thing.. someone pls gimme a wake up call..

lastly.
if it wasnt frm u, i wldnt hve let the doors open. U shwd me love, u gve me love.. but u crushed it with love.
but im ok.. =))
BIG SMILES BOZZO.. haha
its all memories now.. sweet memories

p/s: i wanna have body like Michael Copon.

Labels: Amerie

Tuesday, May 20, 2008

I Understand 4:39 AM

Its painful to see ur loved ones go away..
it was hard to stop the emotion sway..

pretendin was never easy..
i was never trying to be sleazy..

wen frens are made enemies..
towers are toppled..
we knew it was never meant to end like this..
yet it leaves us troubled..

Well, thts nothing to do with me and Amerie, but to a friend. Its hard to let go, its hard to swallow, but sometimes we do need to reflect on ourselves. As much as we love someone, we need to mirror oursleves, what wrong had we done dat cause the situation. Evry decison, evry answer every action comes with reasons. You just need to sit and think, its no use blabbering how much u love someone without thinking..

For if she loved you trul, it'll be back i swear. it was never a matter of how long. it was never a matter of love, it was never a matter of thousand apologies. Trust is the answer my friend. For with trust comes love, with love comes comfort.

So dear friend, take a break for nw. Give it time.. give it space.. and leave the rest to God's will.
Yes, i feel you.. I still love Amerie. I'll be lying if i said no, but you need to learn to respect, to accept things the way it is. Its not wrong to continue on loving tht someone, but we need to know our limits. If its out of bounds, let it be. It hurts to see them happy with other ppl, but have you thought the other way round? why need to be hurt, wen we can be happy for them?

Learn to be happy.. for true happiness does not come from others..
it comes from within....

p/s: to Amerie, yes i still do love you, But its ok, i love you as a friend. No matter what i'll b dere for you, in the mean time, we'll pray for this fren of mine aite?

3months left to go babe..
you know where im going.. hohoho!

Labels: Amerie

Monday, May 19, 2008

Why Do "U" Out of ABCs Matter 1:28 AM

Last Saturday was DX3 comp. Yeah, it was a blast. Evryone did great. I don't give a fruck wad the judges say, or anyone else say. We did great honestly it was nice. Finals or not, i dun care, i had fun during pracs. Lots of love guys!!!
Thx D.Y.K, Thx R.A.G.E and Thx Ling & Daen.
Pics are up at Mas blog.
( i cant b botherd to re-upload the pics la.. lol!! muke hodoh sia!! i miss my fringe)

Work was soo last minute jus nw, i was told tht im supposed to wrk at?? 12am!!!!
crazy or wad?! i was out with my fren go night riding sia!!!
buang/kacau/spoil steam jer.. Niwae, night riding with singlet and shorts is a nono!!! Thx Fad for ur nonsense.. lol!! last minute sia!

Niwae, dah.. i wanna play my pokemon.. hahaha!!!

Lastly,
ANYONE WITH A SPARE/XTRA/NOT USED/NEVER USE/SECOND HAND/UGLY BUT WORKABLE MAC LAPPIE CHARGER, PLS TAGG ME OK?
I HAVE A FRIEND THAT LOST HER CHARGER, AND IT'LL BE A GREAT HELP IF YOU GUYS CAN HELP HER.. THX BIRDIES

p/s: i noe its been long since i have dis small section. wad should i say eh... err.. macam, ure missed lah. n im glad we sme sort gt to see each other at DX3, and, i dun feel awkward.. i mean nt tht much wen i see u nowadays.. u take care now.. lol!!
Oh NS.. biler la nak sampai!!! lol...

I guess im leaving civilian life soon.
bye, Starbucks.. bye, Dance..
i'm nt leaving permanently, i'll be back!!!
and definitely NO bye to u.. selengs.. lol!

Labels: Amerie, Dance

Sunday, April 27, 2008

Happy 18th Birthday Babe 11:20 PM

Happy Birthday to you~
Happy Birthday to you~
Happy Birthday to Ayeen~
Happy Birthday to you~....
(Now sing ala Michael Buble)

Another year added to the age, u're 18. Well, soo i did went to her bdae chalet/party, it was great.. minus the part i gt a splitting headache and gt to go home. darn~ Serious babe, it wasnt abt u-noe-wad that i went home, ive even innitially wanna overnite with you guys, but noone to take my shift tmrw morning, and this splitting headache will make me vomit, which i did aftr alighting from the bus at tamp int. gerrrr~

Ayeen, finally 18.. she look pretty, should i say.. babe you were gorgeous in that candy.. pop colored candy dress. I was in awe. I mean, how rare is it to see you in such wonderful dress?
Niwae, its great.. love the food, love the company..

It was nice, i'm going to miss you while i'm away.. well at least what that had to be done, had been done. Whatever that i had done, been doin for you is ikhlas, from my heart. I never once lied to you, and yes, the reason i went home is not coz of us.. its coz of the headache, and i dunwan to spoil ur party by having me vomitting everywhere.. heh! serious ok. And thanks for everything.. the pics.. the 5mins..

lastly, wait is no longer the option,
never feel guilty for you had done nothing wrong, i won't wanna hear that word from you again, whatever it is babe, i will be there whenever you need me aite..
for now, study hard.. don't always go home late..
prove to yourself and your parents you can do it..
you have my prayers and support in whatever you do..

i had my say, and i hve no regrets..
first girl who acknowledged me..
take care of urself and Baby Starr.. yes that bear.. lol!!!
thanks babe..
Thank You Ayeen,
EinstarR, the star that truly shines..

Fuuuhhh~ pics will be up once i gt it from Alif Bibir.. lol!!!
ok and im done here..
and i leave this post with a smile.. a true smile tht ive been hiding for a year, yes babe, im smiling.. coz i finally had said to you in person wadever tht ive kept to myself..
Im proud to had done what i did.. yeay!!!
and lemme see, tht alone takes 139.786% of my courage.. lol!!!!!

Tata.. bloppers!!! more pics click here

Labels: Amerie

Saturday, April 26, 2008

Less Than 5 Months 12:59 AM

Hush hush~ to those who knows about the "less den 5mths thingy". I jus tell my close frens or ppl tht are close to me. Im not ready to tell evryone yet. Even i myself can't digest the fact.
ccb.. peh puki ninabei peh anjing~

Ohk.. wadever.. im off to do special surprise..

and im bored.. Saza's bdae later..
Ayeen's bdae tmrw.. =)

crazy la.. crazy.. need go smoke sia..
im soo .. ahhh~!!!!

p/s: never had a dream come true. you came into the dream again, wishd it was real.. i really wishd.. miss you babe.. i really do tho i dun show it..
malu lerrr....

Labels: Amerie

Friday, April 25, 2008

A Comeback 12:10 AM

Hello yellow.. sorry for the lack of posts. I've been very very busy.. i noe neglect my siblings all.. i dunnoe la.. bro Arfy is like in dunno whre,, Sis contact me bt im owaes busy to reply to her, i feel soo bad. Niwae, ive been busy with work in the mornin till late aftrnoon, den rush off to dance at wdlands aftr wrk. n guess my amnt of slp per typical day? Bus rides and esp train rides. Fcuk!

Ohh i soo hate my hiar now coz its not str8. Cibai larh.. hmm..
summore wad? ohh DYK is nw 5members strength with the addition of Ryna. Wooots~~~

Niwae, Saza's bdae is this Saturday.. n Ayeen's bdae as well as Yenny's is this Sunday. Bnyk nyer bdae!!!

lol!!! When's my turn? lol!

kk.. i bored now.. wanna go mandi den do some spa on myself.. wakakakak!

p/s: babe, what if i say i miss you? What if i say the feelings never changed? well.. i dunnoe, sometimes i just wishd you noe hw i feel for u.. sometimes i jus wish u wld talk to me.. sometimes i jus wished things nvr had to be this way.. sometimes.. i just wish..
wishes come treu at times.. well do they???

2days to ur bdae babe.. 2days.. =)

Labels: Amerie, Dance, Starbucks

Tuesday, April 01, 2008

Things to Catch Up On 7:42 AM

Well ehhlo guys, its bck to dance. Work just now was fun since its just us. with Ida frm Tanglin. Cracks me up since 7am in da mornin. hahaha! Dance was a total whack! The routine was fucking dope shit. lol! ihate to use the word "dope".. fcukin posers la.. lol! ok so just put it in MY simple terms. It was a nice one. D.Y.K and Karma? simply loved. =))

Cik (Kak) Hasnah treated us to KFC. hahah! KFC aftr seriously looong mths.. or issit years? can't remember bt, i noe its the ferst KFC fr this year. lol! i noe, sadistic chicken life story.

Prac at RP turn out great too. I'm beginning to slowly wake up. Love myself for that. tapi aku macam ade rase, dier tak sayang aku lagi. tapi takper la.

anyway, i wanna go slp now.. hohoho!!! wrking lata sia.. n i jus gt bck home..
chalo betehx!! ohh, i miss my siblings of diff parents like very much. Ryna and Arfy, we gt to meet up soon.. love you guys!!!

p/s: my heart skips a beat whenever i see you.. eh no two beats.. eh three.. ok.. you get the picture. but.. does your heart beats the same reaction?

Labels: Amerie, Dance

Thursday, March 27, 2008

Apart From It All 11:22 PM

Apart from it all.. huh? i've been tonning with the dancers at Titanic.. wrking my ass out and all.. ohh, my poly admission was unsuccessful. Most prolly im going NS soon. Haiz.. im not ready yet la..

Coffee presentation tmrw.. ohh damn.. shit.. k bye all!!!

p/s: Babe, will you b willing to listen if i were to talk? miss you.. i do. Trust me, click on me.. it will bring you to another story, my story.

Labels: Amerie, Dance, Starbucks

Friday, March 21, 2008

Dedicated to Myself 11:59 PM

With every passing moment, this beat gets louder. It's so loud yet can't be heard. Even the thundering roar of the bustling city life is dimmed by it. Inferior as it seems, so mighty.. yet i am the only one that hears it.

It was once, a story.. perhaps a legend.. and some say a myth, to me it was evergreen. Why do we try, try so hard when its basically a necessity. It was once pure almond joy, filled with butter creams and drizzled with caramel; now it was all left to diamond dust. It wasn't misery for I'm still trying. Strong as the heart goes, weak as my body starts to feel.

Could all these while I'm breathing the air of emptiness, is it so cold, that standing in the hot sun feels no warmth without knowing, without having you by my side? Friends aplenty, but it was never the same when i used to know, i have someone to share this life with. Maybe it was stupid, maybe it wasn't for me to continue on loving.

I tried to forget, for then i realize, i was just lying to myself. How long can i lie, it barely last for a minute. This heart beats its own rhythm, it never changed since, and it beats just for you.

For why i still stand alone, is the fear; the fear that i myself don't understand. I'm missing you with each passing moment, the tears that i shield away with, just like how umbrella keeps us dry. It was just an act to the public, that i was never affected by this post-break syndrome. How only God knows.

Dear Diary,
Will she forgive me for my mistakes in the past? Had she forgiven me? Had i did my best? for i sure did not. I've yet to shower her rays of colors, just like the heavenly rainbows. I promised, i promised to make her happy, tears of sorrow or hatred will not be in our dictionary. I told myself, i will never go back on my words. For this is my first love; corny as it seemed, but truthfully told.

Maybe, i don't really understand these feeling, but I'm beginning to understand and learn from you. Yes, absence does make the heart grew fonder. I'm beginning how it is, to feel alone. Your presence, tho for awhile, made me a better man. You acknowledged me for who and what i am. You made me realize that, i don't need to be anybody, for i can just be myself.

Dear Diary, have i failed?

Dreams, they come; and they go. Can i wish for them to stay? just like how we wished our prophet will stay with us? You appear now and then, as vague shadows, playing in the unconscious mind. You played in my dreams, i felt it. But i still wished that time will make it real. I was foolish, i was stupid; i promised never to hurt you, but i did. Not that i hurt you, i hurt myself too.

Now babe, will you one day understand how much i need you? how much i missed you? and the only one who i can say how much i love you. It'll take days, months, years.. I'll wait. Give me a sign just like how lightning came before thunder.

I'll still hold on to my promise, i will never hurt you ever again.
For this heart still beats one rhythm, and the rhythm is you.

silenced cries will remain..
for only you i will stay..

p/s: this boy needs his comfort zone.

Labels: Amerie

Thursday, March 20, 2008

Coffee Presentation/Confusion 11:00 PM

Heylo guys.. its my off day again. yes! but instead of spending time wif my crew or brother n sista a.k.a Arfy and Jaja... I was like sleeping, den i was like thinking abt wad tod o fr the coffee presentation thingy. And soo i did my research part on it. I'm halfway done wif the core design for the invitation card for this wonderful event of the year of SB-MW, i'll be completng the design by Saturday, to be sent out to stores islandwide..

Anywae, since you guys are reading.. come down to SB-Millennia Walk; Friday the 28th and yeap.. time TBC. ouuh ouhh.. n since you guys are reading, Arfy's hving his very own coffee presntation on 25th March at SB-Compasspoint, Sengkang. Dun mix the dates up ryte?? his would be at 6.30pm i think.. SOo just come for both la.. lol!! it's his last presentation prior to serving the nation.

NIwae, im blogging dis for the sake of relieveing post-design stress. tired la.. ok!! im soo hoping to get into a school soon!!! i wanna study.. i seriously do.

ok chalo readers.. im off to smoke n smoke.. n ok.. Jaja.. i miss you, Arfy? asyik jumpe ko jer.. jelak la.. lol!! jkjk!! can't be jelak of the resident.himbo bitch bro of mine with whom i go crazy with!!! wakakakakaka!]

p/s: i pray all goes well.. i really am praying for us. i'll jus provide u with this thing called "love" which i've yet to understand. Nothing else but just love at its purest form. i shall still wait. my silence dun mean i dun care, it dun mean i dun feel.. it dun mean i dun see... i'm just shy.. and you know me better..

ok stupid ayul shut up.. and i see my bro getting ready to smack me the next second i type another emo sentence. lol!

Labels: Amerie

Tuesday, March 18, 2008

Off Day Walkabout 11:30 PM

Its my freagin off day and it clashes with Arfy's off-day.. the usual.. haha!! shopping and window shopping with tht bitch. Haha! its always filled with laughters sia.. soo wh not.. tolerating each others' nonsensical antics. Soo since its my off day, we're like supposed to meet.. READ, supposed to meet at 11am fr breakfast, end up meeting at 12pm.. NOOOOO.. someone overslept soo end up miting at 1+. Ferst stop.. supposed destination was SB-EP.. end up we jump str8 to SB-RC. Den off to Bugis..

TOPMAN babey.. well not me, i can't be shopping wen im $$$-less ryte?? lol!! so basically accompany tht pendek around la n all the while talking abt is "imaginary love life". wakakaka!! Stop it sia br.. lol!! soo he bought a tee.. den off to House of Japan to find his faded jeans.. terrible terrible sia.. the jeans are either too big.. soo fugly or too faded and tattered but we found a pair tht matches perfectly..

from there.. took a cab to Hougang to meet wif our beloved sis Jaja.. whos recovering frm her fall.. and ohhsoo jahat.. lol!!! went to have minor drinking session alongside eating.. lapar seyy ayul!!!

and time jus flew soo fast wen im out wif dem.. frm dere, sent Jaja home, whos like now busy wif international calls.. lol!!!! and we're off to slack at SB-CM.. den went home at 12.15am feeling ohh soo tired.. and hungry.. hungry = me. lol!!!
i wanna gain 10kg!!! fuckingly yeah!!! i want 10 kg lurh!
upon reaching hme sweet home, took out Almond Croissant frm fridge and dig into cheesecake at the same time.. hungry!!! and den i realised im wrking tmrw morning.. ohh brother..

kk.. im tired and lazy now.. bbye fucktards..

p/s: you exactly know how i feel if u reach in deeper.

Labels: Amerie, Outing

Saturday, March 15, 2008

DanceComp/StoreChalet 11:59 PM

The day before was fuckingly hectic, with last minute purchases, sewing the pieces together and lastly, training till the wee hours of the morning.. argh!!! and den today, its the day of the comp. Gt to say its was D.Y.K ferst and best ever performances even to be compared with its Urbanites days. We din manage to clinch any awards but well some of us know why. Its a damn pathetic reason to minus points tht way since judging criteria doesnt mention it. And, even if its supposed o be deducted, i guess u need to weigh the dance performance itself. lol! but fuck, we're still winners.. lalala!

Make up and hair was fantabulous, Mas looks like some rock chikadook sia!! me? my face like fucking cibai drag... but i like the eye..
Dress wise, its e ferst comp/performance where everybody puts in real effort.. freaking goood la seyy..

Aftr dat was a crazy run fr me to the store chalet. Macam orang giler i tell you..
its nice too see the original team again, however, the chalet jus dun feel dat kecoh, maybe perhaps i cme oready too late at nite or perhaps i dunno.. i jus dun feel it. hmm.. k nvm shut up ayul.

Goin up against Naz's gf was funny.. lol!!! thx to pendek ar.. lol! I jus took a shot of chivas coz i dunno, i guess i only drink when the company arnd me drnk soo.. haha.. i guess dats y i jus took a shot.

And i guess the rest of the crew are slacking at the P.Ris Chalet. hahaha!
kk.. i very tired to blog oready, wen pics are up ill repost the link aite.. waiting fr the vids frm Wani larh.. ohh n pics oso!!! lol!!!
-------------------------------------
updated, click on the pic below to bring you to the whole album.

chalo!!!

p/s: short conversations made the heart grw fonder babe. And i trust you to trust me. =)

Labels: Amerie, Dance

Saturday, March 08, 2008

Batam Day 1 11:59 PM

Holla, soo i'll just start off with the posts from here on, separating into 3 parts to make it more enjoyable to read. Soo, hmm.. ya.. i left for Batam wif my aunt..and.. i dragged along 2 pumpkins as companions. The usual.. haha.. i dragged chucky chuck chuckles and baby gaj. hehehe!!! i know. Ohh the trip was kinda sickly.. wad u expect? we're travelling by vessel sia. Ohh, and i totally brought along like a whole big bag. wakakakaka! its better to be safe den sorry ryte?

Reachd dere arnd 1pm, okok.. from here on, i'm just gonna type down the time according to the Batam time. Niwae, i frgt to mention, i went to the island of Blakang Padang; in other words its a kampong side of Batam, with tht upon arrival.. i was like.. errr...errr.. 4days 3 nites??? are u kiddin me? Soo that was my mindset for the ferst few minutes, complainin to Arfy. wakakakaka!

Got the house, ferst things ferst.. typical malays.. makan time.. haha.. den all of us gt changed and head out to ride bikes. yesh!!! motorcycles.. wehre no helmets needed, no license needed, no age limit.. max cap can go up to 4.. erm.. no side mirrors.. spoilt seepdometers and fuel gauge.. but fuck.. i had fun!!! like seriously big time. From roads dat don seem like roads, for the record, dey dun have signs.. no t'lights... no directional arrows.. and and.. haha.. the wooden bridge with lotsa holes and no railings.. crazy sia!!!! Me and Arfy was like soo excited alongside Amer and e rest. haha.. crazy i tell u. moreover dat Arfy was like soo happy he usually sped off only to realise the rest is still way behind coz of some stuffs.. hahahahaha!! and he tried to rempit with me.. GOHS!! i'm not a boy rempit larh!!! hahahaha!

I seriously effing duno wad to type oread sia.. we did alot of walking, buying food.. eating.. shopping.. haha.. i love theayam penyet larh sial!!! freaking nice.. the sambal issit?? ya i think soo was soo spicy tht it gave me multiple orgasms.. ahakz!

Ohh ohh.. we went to this place called the Pasir Putih.. literally translated as White Sands.. haha! its like a small beach, with a coffee shop, and a performing area, apparently we went there at around noon, soo theres basically only us and one more table. Sipping away coconut was soo fun.. hahaha!!! i know, im very the jakunz larh!!!

Dat nite, we went to eat.. i know we cant stop eating.. at some shop by the road. Eating a superbly nice bowl of mee ayam a.k.a chicken noodle. Den head off to sleep.. haahhaa.. but well we kinda sleep very late. Talking with Arfy, Rina, Amer and Surry.. Amer and Surry are kinda like our tour guides.. hahaha!!! they're superbly nice.. and thinking bout tht, it mkes me miss dem alot..

p/s: my aunts' not the main story, shes with the oldies, its a story abt 2 SG dude, 1 SG girl, 1 Batam dude, and 1 Batam girl..

p/s/s: i dreamt about you this ferst night, i dreamnt you were with us..

niwae, i seriously dunno wad to type, well.. jus look into the pics la..
click on this pic to bring you to a page with the entire album of Day 1

Labels: Amerie, Vacation

Friday, March 07, 2008

Leaving for Batam 4:09 AM

Hi guys, i'm writing this up in advance. Soo where did i went just now, oohh.. i went to my workplace to pass tht pendek some stuff.. and niwae dude, tadi aku ngh berak i gt another idea fr the coffee presentation thingy.. I know, i gt ideas at the weird places ever..

Ohh, n i stopped by the IT fair too..
pukimak anjing!!! many people lar sey.. crazy crazy many people.. haha!
It was me, Arfy and Aini.. stoogers going around taking pics with the SLR cams.. hahahaha!!! it was on demo.. soo.. ohh, n one of the big people from Sony was dere..
he said something as "some-sing"... Japanese.. oh well..

Soo after the we paraded ourselves at heart of bustling Orchard Rd. Having our lunch-ner at Cahaya. Hmm.. sedappp.. and window shopped.. and soo i found Ms Love. lol!!! Love at first side, she was in red with white trimmings... lol! ITS A BAG FOR FUCK SAKE!!!!
$83.. woo.. im soo getting it..
too stuff alot of things dat is.. esp for 15th March.. dance comp and den off to chalet.. i need a bag that size!!! im getting it i swear..

on a side note.. i oready had more den half of my pay gone in less den 5mins.
11.30pm = $550
11.35pm = $260.. -_-"

alamakci!!! how eh to survive.. stupid HP bills.. stupid!!!!!
kklah.. i need to go pack my bag(s) oready.. hehehe!!! c'mon Batam.. here i come.. n ohh did i mention the taxi driver just now, thot i was chinese.. -_-" soo i just conversed with him in mandarin reluctantly tho.. mandarin is my 3rd language for freeaaakk sake.
naseb baik aku tau aper dier bobal n naseb baik aku tau jawab dier.. hehehehehe!!!

coz i find it rude to say..
"UNCLE I NOT CHINESE LA!!!!"
"Sorry, i'm not Chinese =)"
"Sorry, i don't get you"
"Uncle!!! wo pu sze hua ren, wo sze mahlai ren"

ok wadever..
n for days im gonna miss tht girl.. bt heck, our pics still in my phone.. issit??? =)
aiyah stupid one-sided love.. shut up ayul.. bye guys..
ILL BE BACK!!!!

bye Amerie.. =) (sukernah aku bobal sendiri, menyampau)

Labels: Amerie, Outing

Thursday, March 06, 2008

Another Day Missing You 3:29 AM

Ohh well..
here i am sick again. Damn, im getting super sickly nowadaes lurrhh.. like wadde FUCK s wrong with my body. 1 answer to it, i had not been getting enough meals.. urgh!!! no money = no food to buy.. mom's working = noone to cook fer me. Haiz, if only tht someone will cook for me like how she used to promise me dat she would.. bt nvm.. store chalet coming up.. haiz.. it would be nice if dejavu would to happen.. store chalet.. SMS non-stop.. rush to top up.. paham paham la, mase tu boboy pakai pre-paid katekan..

soo where was I? oohh.. went to compass to pass Ayis the CD alongside see-ing tht Arfy tortured wif slam.. lol!!! den the rest cam down, slack for awhile den go home.. cannot tahan lurh, i'm having a bad headache spinning like roller coaster, and my visio nis getting blurrer.. very very.. its trokla!!! ... i need to get lenses quick.. $$$.. evrything all money eh!

I cant strain my eyes too much, wad more with Rina asking me n Arfy too look at a bird, which both of us cant see.. at 2am in the mornin.. -_-".

Tmrw.. i mean later.. Thursday.. IT fair.. should i go? even if im not going i still need to go to SB-MW to pass my proposal about the coffe presentation door gift idea, which I as the supposed leader of these presentation is still clueless on what fuck to do...!!!! i need help in this sia..
SB-RC has a nice invitation card, the hard copy is in this fcuking comp coz SB-RC is where my elder bro wrks at and he's done with the design of the invitation card.. i'm still 0% in doing anyhing.. i need to meet up with my other 2 SCMs to discuss about this shits sia.. Ohh Hadi n Shasha.. help me lurhh.. boboy stress ar...

K nonsense!!! @$#$%%^W!
Ayul is super sick.. his digimons are stupid.. asyik kalah jer..
and i'm missing her more and more..
Dear Ex-date.. ahh forget it.. like as if she reads this dumb blog of mine..

okok.. if you read ar... i wanna say.. erm.. the usual la.. ure fcukin missed..
Ok Mas/Jaja/Arfy and whoever who forbids me to miss her is gonna scream at me now.. argh!! nnoooo!!! BUt fuck.. i miss her not you all wad.. soo heck la..

ohh i gt to know i need to dance for Mass Dance. -__-".. tired can..
lemme seee...
7-12 March = Batam Trip
13-15 March = Prep and Dance Comp
15-16 March = Store Chalet
21 March = Coffee Presentation

DO I SEE REST DAYS FOR ME?? I'M TIRED LA.. AM REALLY AM..

p/s: haiz.. dis store chalet thingy brings me back to how we used to SMS non-stop, n i made u worried coz i fell aslp wen i gt drunk n din reply to ur msgs n how i was soo sorry the next day. sweet sweet memories.. which is just.. memories..

ohh, i heard frm ppl ure attachd/dating someone? hmm.. tkperla.. as long ure happy i'm happy.. i'm not the type who fights for this thing called love, coz i believe if we're meant to be.. we will.. one day dis half-piece of heart will merge wif yours again like how it used too..

dun tke any offence if i never talk, look at you.. or anything tht potrays i'm arrogant to u or anything, its just.. i dunno how to face u anymore.. its mixed feelings.. i'm just afraid girl.. afraid..
soo till i gt my courage to look at you in the eye again, we shall just be .. how we are..
Love, Sad, Anger.. its all mixed up..

I wanna feel again, how it is to be important to someone.. for all i noe, i was never important.. k im not emo lah readers, im jus saying u noe, the importance, the feeling of a loved one who.. cant slp without msn-ing to each other every nite in the wee hours of the mornin?? i miss all these..
i miss tht name appearing on my inbox. i miss tht msn window.. lastly, i miss your smile..

K DONE.. ckp lah aku bobal.. haha watching sappy love movies do touch my heart.. haha.. for the record i teared.. okok.. i cried watching "Love Is Cinta". diam ar.. .. shut up.. dun laugh.. im jus sensitive to love stuffs can.. caho turban go and die.. luff at me summore..

niwae.. nites readers.. nites Amerie..

Labels: Amerie

Wednesday, March 05, 2008

I Miss You 6:42 PM

Damn, im missing tht girl.. again..
Ok i better stop myself from saying this to avoid being lectured by lotsa ppl, typically Mas n Arfy.. hahaha!!! okok!! soo final mix for the smack that comp is out. Wooo!!! i love the sound of it sia!!!
Fuck im fucking low on cash.. gotta submit this CD later to Ayis..

meeting tht bro of mine at his wrkplace.. n apparently tmrw i need to gt a hair cut and all.. cibia larh!!! IT fair tmrw, accompanying Arfy, but gt to find a way how to.. lol!
Ok this new skin is soo LOVE!!!

ok im tired larh.. dunno wad to type; just the WHY must we participate in the mass dance thing, im soo busy oready sia.. damn.. fuck chibai adios.. i wanna go bathe!

Labels: Amerie

Wednesday, February 27, 2008

misery business 3:19 AM

Second chances they don't ever matter, people never change
What's a whore you're nothing more, I'm sorry, that'll never change
And about forgiveness, we're both supposed to have exchanged
I'm sorry honey, but I'm passin' up, now look this way!

Well, there's a million other girls who do it just like you
Looking as innocent as possible to get to who
They want and what they like it's easy if you do it right
Well I refuse, I refuse, I refuse!

Hmm CMC was over, it feels nice that its over.. haha! Thursday will be the results.. i hope i pass.. i mean ya, i hope i do, i hardly accept failures.. Thursday to register for Poly. Yeay!!! Hope to register wif my B shimah.. haha, cant imagine if both of us gt in.. hahaha!

Dance had been gtting tough, love it tho.. time.. all i need is time.. im squeezing evrything..
Oohhh!! im off fr vacation next wk, a.k.a out of Singapore!!!
for nealry 1 week.. gt green light from store manager to take 1 week off.. YEAY!!!

Yesterday was working kinda full shift. For awhile i feel soo satisfied to wrk full shift. Im sick and tired of short hours at work!!!
soo it was opening at MW, and closing at CM thnx to whoever.. soo they need ppl n bro called.. soo since i gt nothing to do, wrk lor.. Frap has never gt me sick till tht day. Sengkang ppl needa chnge of menu la.. lol!

lastly;
the lyrics above does not refer to Amerie. Some of it does but nt the entire meanig. f.y.i read in btwn e lines. I dun hate n will never hate e girl who touchd my life. =))

Labels: Amerie

Tuesday, December 04, 2007

hate that i love you 2:04 AM

And I hate how much I love you girl
I can’t stand how much I need you
And I hate how much I love you girl
But I just can’t let you go

Lately, i've been thinking of you girl. I've been. Even if it isn't lately.. i've ben thinking of u sincewheneva and wherever. I tried to move on.. I even changed myself, but i know these all will mever work coz u already occupied dis heart. You took the key and never returned it. This heart will no longer open up to others coz only u have the key. And im still very sorry tht i hurt you before, and i will never forgive myself kaes. This is a just a post for you..

One of these days maybe your magic won’t affect me
And your kiss won’t make me weak
But no one in this world knows me the way you know me
So you’ll probably always have a spell on me..

I know this sentence soo much and its wad i'm feeling now. But the difference is dat youre magic still works and had always put u as top priority.

And I can’t stand ya
Most everything you do
make me wanna smile
Can I not like you for awhile

Haha, i guess many know tht you're slightest presence be it sms, or in person.. i already go haywire..
haiz.. this is my story.. my only story..

p/s: i still treasure you as much as we ferst met.. =)

*lyrics from Rihanna ft. Ne-Yo : Hate That I Love You*