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Sunday, November 29, 2009
emotions
2:14 AM Emotions I don't need sore losers, yes im arrogant, obnoxious.. wadev. I'm not bothered by others words. Yes i noe i'm not perfect, and so are you. Niwae, this post isn't about hatred, its about me. It sucks to be me i guess. Hmm is that guy your new guy? lol! i'm just curious girl, if yes, congrats.. really; hope he'll treat you with lotsa respect. Yeah, felt a tad jealous only just now, but only a tad. Haha! but my gut feelings says that its just friends? idk, i'd rather be on the safe side. Miss you still bozzo. =) Life is complex now i guess. Keep searching for the right one, but it seems i'm just too naive and stupid. I don't trust people easily, but when i do, i always get hurt; why? Maybe i shouldn't be even searching for love. Maybe like how it happened 2years ago, maybe i should just not expect anything. The feeling was wonderful, i realise that the more i search for this 4 letter word, the more shit i get myself into. Went to DanceXplosion4 just now. Saw some familiar plastics, its either they are faking a smile or making me feel oblivious; then again your lost. I'm like giggling to myself looking at these people. Oh mary! Silence kills eh... actually smetimes i envy people with loved ones. HOw they cuddled and all, love like a form of drug; it makes them go high. Was observing my surroundings for 10mins, almost everyone has someone to turn to when it comes to love. We;;, there i was sitting on the railing, staring into empty space. Oh well, we'll see.. i'm not a sappy person, soo let's jus continue these new chapter. adios bloppers. Thursday, November 26, 2009
Thnks Fr E Memmries
11:30 PM Hey, u make me crash down ground zero, soo pls dun bother talking to me ok. U made me in such a confused state and situation soo just leave. Dont bother me. U got ur NEW guy soo yeah go and dote on him. Dun try to play ur games on me anymore. Ohh u feel like u haven won uh? okla i give it to u; i hate playing games anyway. Dun take me too easy, fr a record im a cold hearted bitch. I bite back. Yeah, i noe hu ur new guy is, fr a record ive even met him face to face before. lol! funny uh, succha small world full of pretenders. Niwae, Happy 20th bdae alepo sanchez, i doubt u read my blog but heres to u dude. and to the muslims hu celebrate killing kambings, lol! slamat hari raye aidil adha? did i spell it correctly? lol! last but not least, DX4 Grand Finals this Saturday. im soo gonna go n watch it. i realise i do blush whenever i talk to her.. god dammit!! hhahahah!!! okla.. im having my angsty moments nw, thnx fr PM-ing me. Like i said before, dont bother me anymore k. thnx.. i may just gt angry n den since the loan sharks are soo in the spotlight, i shld jus go ur hse n spill paint on ur door. hahaha! soo near wad.. 1 bus away only. hahahaha! taarrraahhh.. serious babe, jus have fun with ur life, dun bother mine oready. u r just a memory to remind myself never to fall for people like u tht cost me lotsa shits. thx. LESSON LEARNT Monday, November 23, 2009
Confusion
4:09 AM Im pretty much confused. guess evryone agrees with tht. Haha!! idk wad am i seekin in life. hahaha!!! when i seek love it bcme lust, when i seek lust it bcme love. nono, boboy not in love.. had few crushes but bleargh; not gd enough fr me. wakaakakak!! lifeless people! Boys Nite Out was fantabulous. who was dat gurl man? on a lighter note, the "girl" was still locked away. entah uh.. shld i rekindle the flame or just let it be frens. On the fcuked up side, why shld i be jealous. pening uh aku. ur so called bf is plain jack. hahaha!! ure oso 1 confused person eh? lol!!! k lah.. n i shld stop giving excuses when it cmes to wrking out. getting gemz oready. lalala... models shld maintain a healthy figure... NOT! eh i want you and you.. you oso can.. eh u ok la... wtf? btw shpping list fr next mth is up.. pants baybehx.. and a long awaited trip to NUM. eh, have fun tau.. tkmo dapat AIDS sua.. lol! BITCH Saturday, November 21, 2009
Gimme Back My Life!
1:23 AM I just realized. 1yr1mths of NS shizzles had passed. Time flies. Where i stand now; wad i had sacrificed, hope i did the right things. However the downside, life had become monotonous.. too monotonous, the myriad of colors no longer exist. Evrything had turn.. dull.. from tees to vests bold to bald, no questions asked. who am i back then.. pages flipped on the calender stand look where i got to people change and so did my muse where was all the clueless bald boys? angst slaves of nation now? i have no answer. sacrificed love wad was it anyway? friends became a weekend luxury not gold but platinum. how the rarest metal was made cheap. sigh~ choices given laid like tarot cards on a round table no matter where you sit or how you flip, life's unpredictable. i flipped my card. its empty.. is it the void? pitch dark black only some whispers now and then. plain decision made, i took the card no questions asked, just murmuring to myself why did i chose this path? i shut my eye lay down my pencil, i drew a circle two dots and a crescent moon. wow! a happy face re-create? or make belief? leave that to fate. ten months to go back to where the colors start flowing slowly but surely.. putting back life together again and trying to remember.. who am i back then? Saturday, November 14, 2009
In Denial
9:27 PM I'm missing them. I don't care what they wanna say about me but i miss them. Labels: friends do matter.. alot to me |
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