Ah-Yul Blogspot; Serial Confessionist

Hey, u make me crash down ground zero, soo pls dun bother talking to me ok. U made me in such a confused state and situation soo just leave. Dont bother me. U got ur NEW guy soo yeah go and dote on him. Dun try to play ur games on me anymore. Ohh u feel like u haven won uh? okla i give it to u; i hate playing games anyway.

Dun take me too easy, fr a record im a cold hearted bitch. I bite back.

Yeah, i noe hu ur new guy is, fr a record ive even met him face to face before. lol! funny uh, succha small world full of pretenders.

Niwae, Happy 20th bdae alepo sanchez, i doubt u read my blog but heres to u dude.

and to the muslims hu celebrate killing kambings, lol! slamat hari raye aidil adha? did i spell it correctly? lol!

last but not least, DX4 Grand Finals this Saturday. im soo gonna go n watch it. i realise i do blush whenever i talk to her.. god dammit!! hhahahah!!!

okla.. im having my angsty moments nw, thnx fr PM-ing me. Like i said before, dont bother me anymore k. thnx.. i may just gt angry n den since the loan sharks are soo in the spotlight, i shld jus go ur hse n spill paint on ur door. hahaha! soo near wad.. 1 bus away only. hahahaha!

taarrraahhh.. serious babe,

jus have fun with ur life, dun bother mine oready. u r just a memory to remind myself never to fall for people like u tht cost me lotsa shits. thx. LESSON LEARNT

Monday, November 23, 2009

Confusion 4:09 AM

Im pretty much confused. guess evryone agrees with tht. Haha!! idk wad am i seekin in life. hahaha!!! when i seek love it bcme lust, when i seek lust it bcme love.

nono, boboy not in love.. had few crushes but bleargh; not gd enough fr me. wakaakakak!! lifeless people!

Boys Nite Out was fantabulous. who was dat gurl man?

on a lighter note, the "girl" was still locked away. entah uh.. shld i rekindle the flame or just let it be frens.

On the fcuked up side, why shld i be jealous. pening uh aku.

ur so called bf is plain jack. hahaha!! ure oso 1 confused person eh? lol!!!

k lah.. n i shld stop giving excuses when it cmes to wrking out. getting gemz oready.

lalala... models shld maintain a healthy figure... NOT!

eh i want you and you.. you oso can.. eh u ok la...

wtf?

btw shpping list fr next mth is up.. pants baybehx..

and a long awaited trip to NUM.

eh, have fun tau.. tkmo dapat AIDS sua..

lol! BITCH

Saturday, November 21, 2009

Gimme Back My Life! 1:23 AM

I just realized. 1yr1mths of NS shizzles had passed. Time flies. Where i stand now; wad i had sacrificed, hope i did the right things. However the downside, life had become monotonous.. too monotonous, the myriad of colors no longer exist. Evrything had turn.. dull..

from tees to vests

bold to bald, no questions asked.

who am i back then..

pages flipped

on the calender stand

look where i got to

people change and so did my muse

where was all the clueless bald boys?

angst slaves of nation now?

i have no answer.

sacrificed love

wad was it anyway?

friends became a weekend luxury

not gold but platinum.

how the rarest metal was made cheap. sigh~

choices given

laid like tarot cards on a round table

no matter where you sit or how you flip,

life's unpredictable.

i flipped my card.

its empty.. is it the void?

pitch dark black only some whispers now and then.

plain

decision made, i took the card

no questions asked, just murmuring to myself

why did i chose this path?

i shut my eye lay down my pencil, i drew a circle

two dots and a crescent moon.

wow! a happy face

re-create? or make belief?

leave that to fate.

ten months to go

back to where the colors start flowing

slowly but surely..

putting back life together again

and trying to remember..

who am i back then?

Saturday, November 14, 2009

In Denial 9:27 PM

I'm missing them. I don't care what they wanna say about me but i miss them.

Labels: friends do matter.. alot to me

Saturday, October 24, 2009

Don't Put Me In Your Shoes 12:03 AM

I'm feeling quite down lately, but thank god im in camp. I soo can feel it, ever since i went NS, things werent the same anymore. Yeah i noe im kinda outdated with things happenin around me, bt tht doesnt mean u gt to ignore me. I noe ur body languages man. This isnt the ferst time this kinda shits happen. Omg! well im trying not to be bothered by it. Since u guys want me to be invisible then i'll be.

Sorry i'm not a celebrity or sme importnt public figure or mayb im just not cool enuff to b hanging out with u guys like we used to. I cant be bothered much oready, Hey, tell me hw many times ive been duped aside man. Looking at our current jus wanna make me puke. gosh, i feel soo detached. Hahaha! im having mix feelings uh people. Part of me just wanna cry and not think about it. Part of me is soo filled with hatred. Mayb coz of people like you guys, i just cant start trustin.

Haha,, yeah mayb im nt prominent enuff, wad to do. I have a boring life. I dun have JUICY gossips to share to excite a crowd. All i have is myself. Im losing this soo called definitation of "friends". Its soo hard to please evryone eh. This NS 5days a week is putting problems behind. Sometimes i have mixed feelings whenever i book out. Coz i noe im bound to be lonely.

Gone are the times, heads are turning big. But i cant blame u guys, to start off, i was never in this circle. Ive gt my own circle n u guys have urs. Sorry fr entering tht circle 2yrs ago. Nw its owaes i gt to noe myself whenever u guys r out. But nahx, i will no longer jus hang around. I dun hve a thick skin to join up with u guys whenever u guys go out. Very uninvited soo i dun wan la. Summore the faces n body language u guys give; think i stupid or wad.

I GLADLY KNOW IM UNWANTED IN THE VICINITY.

hhahaha!! happy enjoying uhh.. i dun care anymore. Wheres the smses, wheres the replies. None. Not even calls. Im just 1 of the other friends u guys have in Facebook and msn. Brothers n sisters? i got to think deep bout that. First its Arif, now you guys.. I'm hurt all right, thnks for making me once put u guys as top priority.

Monday, October 05, 2009

Another Hiatus 1:04 AM

K.. so new intake is coming soon this Tuesday, scripts prepared lol!! masked on! can't wait or should i say, actually i cant b bothered.

So here it is guys, i'll be gone frm Monday, 12.30pm onwards.. all the ways to 17th October aite.

Anything text me on my hp aite ppl.. lovelies..

Wednesday, September 30, 2009

Celebration 10:27 PM

Wooo!!! finally Blogger had solved their problem. Like Finally. Well i know i hadnt been blogging. Theres jus nothing interesting things to blog about. i aint Perez or Trent who will go the xtra mile to dig out hottest hollywood gossips nor am i ur typical secondary school kid gossiping abt the other kid across the classroom. My life is currently taking a stroll in the park.

Havin this well deserved hiatus from Army life is soo appreciated. Ive even frgttn to do some duties shit. Lol!!! Civilised for too long.

Turnin' 21 in less den a few hours; but i feel theres somethings botherin me.

I dunno y but i jus can feel it. I noe something is bothering me coz ive bcme super moody. I dun do my hair, not even dress up.. im like ur typical nerd.

Oh and i'm smoking bonjour ciggies!!! $8.50.

am freagin broke.. u wldn't wanna noe hw i gt the money.. if u were to knew.. its like fcuking ridiculous...

Thats it.. i got sme straightening up to do.

and to YOU, heres my middle finger.. i dun think u noe i have a blog bt i dun care.

FUCKING WUSS!!!

and i miss my cousin!!!